As I have mentioned in a previous post I consider myself to be a writer. Well, in one of the discussion groups I am in one of the members said he was planning a story about an anti-hero. Now, I enjoy a good anti-hero yarn as much as the next grizzled old ex-army sergeant. I have the complete collection of Destroyer novels (you know, that Remo Williams guy) and follow the Punisher and Wolverine comic-books.
I like to help my fellow writers, but try not to take things too seriously. So, with tongue firmly inserted into cheek, I came up with these:
Credos of the anti-hero:
If you kick them when they’re down, they’re more likely to stay down.
Shoot back first.
Nice guys fit into pine boxes real good.
Kill ’em all and to hell with sorting them out.
If you got a gun and they don’t, that’s their problem.
Don’t be afraid to kill them…they won’t be afraid to kill you.
The only thing better than killing the bad guys is…hmmm…nope, that’s the best thing.
The only fair fight is the one near the Ferris Wheel (think about it.)
Superman doesn’t kill because he’s bullet proof…Batman doesn’t kill because he’s a chump.
You don’t always have to kill them, but you can do it anyway.
Happiness is a warm gun…and dead bodies…LOTS of dead bodies.
The easiest way to get cooperation from a mook is with a sawed-off shotgun aimed below the belt…having the hammer cocked-back helps, too.
Now, I had intended these to be dark-funny. What came next was a barrage of discussion where everybody seemed to take it seriously. BTW, lots of Batman defenders out there. At least one member got the joke, and when I came up with the Top 10 ways to tell if your protagonist is an anti-hero, she asked if she could post them to her blog. Ah, sweet flattery. You can see this list at http://kehinde.com/blog/. This was also tongue-in-cheek (does anybody get that expression anymore?) as is most of my work. But while I like to write humor/horror, I really have the heart of a little boy. I keep it pickled in a jar of alcohol next to my computer screen.
This has NOT been a Wolf Rant.